DAMN IT!

I have a serious case of writer's block. And lazyness.

This is my last year in middle school. Which means it is my last year posting on this blog.

BUT DON'T FRET!

I'll create a new one once I get to high school. But it's not like anyone cares. Not even my friends follow me.

So I guess I gotta start writing more and make this year count. Good luck to me.

My healthy (and delicious) alternatives to everyday junk food

Junk food.

Delicious. Addicting. Hard to live without. Yes, I know, how could a teenager give up those deliciously fattening foods? It is hard. But you must understand that you can't have junk all the time. Now more than ever, kids and teens are way more overweight and obese than way long ago. That is a problem. Solution: Trade those disgustingly unhealthy treats for healthier and pretty tasty and similar alternatives. Here are my takes:

(please note that I am not a trained professional and do not know if these are good to anyone else)

(chili) Cheese fries: Cut up a potato into 1 inch or half inch cubes, bake them until they are cooked, then drizzle with olive oil, Parmesan cheese, and/or shredded low fat chicken, turkey breast, or ham and baked chili beans to make chili-ish. (I'm a vegetarian, so I'll skip this step). If you want that chili flavor, add some chili POWDER. Make sure it's all natural, not that artificial icky stuff.

Hot Cheetos: Yes, I know. Many of you love this. It might be hard to give up, but Cheetos and really bad for you. All it is is artificial corn chips with artificial chili powder. Subtract the artificialness, and you have a decent snack. Get some all natural tortilla chips and sprinkle with all natural chili powder. Yum.

Soda: Get some carbonated water (the bubbly stuff) and put in natural flavoring syrup to make a healthy Italian soda. If you don't have the syrup, just add your favorite juice (natural please!) with no pulp to the bubbly water. You may even add some honey, but no cane sugar or high fructose corn syrup.

Arizona Ice Tea: Everyone at my school loves this. And it is absolutely disgusting. It's just high fructose corn syrup with water and artificial flavouring. Gross. Make your own iced tea, here's my recipe - 1 or 2 green tea bags (all natural) add boiling water and steep until it's strong enough. Put it in a pitcher, refrigerate with some lemon, and when you want it add a little bit of natural honey (no artificial sweeteners!)

Potato chips: Slice some potato into about 1/8 of an inch thick, drizzle with olive oil, and pop it in the oven at 350 f until golden brown. Add all the toppings, dips, and whatever else you want to it.

Ice cream: Freeze your favorite flavor of yogurt (all natural please) and add some fresh fruit, natural chocolate, and/or nuts. Yum.

If you have anything else you want me to health-ify (is that even a word?) feel free to comment on it.

Tips: Always use natural ingredients, organic and local if possible, I know it can get pricey, and if you want it even healthier, use non-fat to low-fat milk, yogurt, blah blah blah.

REMEMBER: You don't always have to follow these rules. Allow yourself to break them sometimes. If your at a party, drink the soda. If your at a restaurant, add something sweet for dessert. Don't turn into a green health freak. Just don't eat junk all the time. A little bit every once in a while is fine.

Thanks for reading, anyone out there.

For Kamaile <3 - Moments of epic fail and LOFE

For Kamaile <3 - Moments of epic fail and LOFE by Tellotubby featuring lace up shoes

Thanks for making one for me, this is one way I could repay you. Thanks for being an amazing friend. Hope you like it.

I. Am. Harry. Freakin'. Potter.

Subway Sandwiches and Horror Stories: The highlight of my life

Today was a very special day.

You see, I'm in a play, and today we had rehearsal. So not only did I have fun acting. When we weren't acting, we were outside, playing in the little kid playground, or we were inside the classroom, being super loud and reading big picture books. But the fun doesn't really start until lunch time.

Our drama teacher told us to decide what we wanted to eat for lunch. We decided on Subway, so a handful of us went there to order for everyone. On the way, on of my best friends had the most wonderful idea. Each person orders their own food, and then I (since I am the smallest) go up and ask for the remaining 10 sandwiches. Me, in pig tails, go up to the sandwich lady and ask for 10 sandwiches. Immediately my friends start cracking up, and while I stand there for about 20 minutes ordering sandwiches, the lady keeps messing up the order on purpose and shooting me "the look". It was SO much fun. In the end we had soggy sandwiches and 80 dollars short, but it was totally worth it. I am officially the best person in the world. (Me and my friends thought this was incredibly funny, but you, not so much.)

When we got back, we continued rehearsal. But in the last half hour we all decided to pull a prank on one of our members. We tricked him into thinking that a mother of one of the students last year was in a relationship with our drama teacher, and that he killed her because she threatened to end the relationship and tell the principal. We all sang in creepy voices like zombies "Lily love you" and screamed quite a few times. It worked, and it was hilarious.

Today was in awesome day. Too bad I am currently ruining your with my blogging.

Adios!

Does Karma Hate Me?: A BLOGPOST

You see, I have been sick for over a week now. After having a cold for about 6 days, my body seemed to have been tired of the sniffles and toilet paper, so it decided to switch to stomach flu. Which SUCKS, because on Christmas day I actually thought I was cured, but the next day my stomach was being a poop. I thought it was just being stupid, so I ignored it and decided to eat regularly, but unfortunately it didn't work. So after a whole day of barely eating anything, I decided to suck it up and take a tums. So all I think is: WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE THIS? I don't understand. I'm not a bad person. I don't kick puppies. I eat pie. Is that so bad?

After that I tried sleeping, and thank God it worked. But after realizing what I have been through, I decided to take it easy and sip chicken soup. Fortunately, that worked, and now (I hope) I am cured. My wife* (my friend, blogger, and schoolmate) posted a list of home remedies to make me feel better, which was very sweet (her blog: http://www.widominneon.blogspot.com). I think it is safe to say I can go stuff myself with pizza and Coca-Cola (my stomach heals pretty fast).

Goodbye. To your relief.

*P.S. I don't know if I told you this, but she is not my wife in real wife. So for all you homophobic people, don't worry, I'm not gay. I'm not against it, I just don't want people to make false accusations. Yeah. *

I write to you from my death bed, no wait, I mean sick bed. NO, sick COUCH.

That's right. I'm sick. How'd you guess? This is alarming to me too, for I NEVER get sick. It's just one of those things where it just doesn't happen to me. Last time I was sick was in May, and that was because I had received 3 shots and got a reaction. It's ironic, because earlier this week I was prancing around in the rain with pants and a tank top, no umbrella, rejecting everybody from letting me borrow a coat and such, saying "I never get sick". Now I lie here, after a grueling and exhausting night of regurgitating, blowing my nose every 10 seconds, an extra heavy duty toilet paper by my side (in this case, my best friend), and sipping hot tea, water, and Gatorade, eating nothing but saltines and apples. And to wrap it all up, Christmas is just days away. Will my sickness evaporate by then?

Anyhoo, I don't know why I am venting this out to you, maybe because I need to find away to escape disgusting mucus, or maybe make you feel sorry for me. I need all the love I can get.

Moral of the story: Don't be a hypocrite, don't predict the future. eventually Karma will take over, and you'll find yourself in an icky, toilet paper mess.

Hallelujah! I'm finished. Go on wit your life now, because I don't have one.

Hooooome alone - At last!

Yes, I am home alone. And let me tell you one thing, it's boring. B-O-R-I-N-G. I can't go out with friends until my parents get home, and no, I am not having a party. So I guess I'll just blog and make you bored too, I have nothing better to do.

SO, I'm here waiting for my parents to get home so I can hang out with my friends Clare, Arael, and Talia. And MAYBE even Kamaile (who is my wife too). You know, hanging out with friends is one of those things that I don't dread. I mean, c'mon, I'm in school from 8:45 to 5:30. I only have half an hour for lunch, and not all classes are fun. I mean, take art class for example, the teacher is always telling us what we HAVE to draw. Isn't art about drawing what you want, only you have eyes for it. Nobody should tell you what to do because art is free, it just flows. Screw Ms. Funk.

This morning I woke up at 10:30 and took the chocolate milk carton and drank it in front of my computer while watching youtube. Isn't that just a brilliant way to spend Saturday mornings? I SHOULD be on a mega-sleepover with my awesome friends, but they all say they are "busy", whatever that means. Instead I laugh my guts out watching videos that have no point in watching while I'm here alone with nothing to do. Isn't my life exiting?

But you don't care, do you?

That's what I thought.

It seems that I can rite here without thinking that my TOTAL life is a bust, because what can I say, I like writing. Your probably inside your minds thinking I'm a nerd, giggling your heads off. But no one said you had to read this. Go ahead, exit this site. It's pointless anyway, it's not gonna change your life and you don't care. But I like writing, I can express what's on my mind that sometimes I can't say out loud. It's a way of creativity. Maybe your thinking, "Oh no. We don't need another Dr. Phil, Goodbye". And your right. We don't. All we need is another person who doesn't care what others think about them and can live their life without judgements. Good luck with that.

I'm boring you too much right? Okay.

Xudafiz! (That's Azerbaijanian for "bye")